Beyond the health benefits of copulation and the pleasure that oftentimes accompanies it, it remains one activity that has been found to boost intimacy among married couples. This explains why marriage counsellors and even religious leaders advise couples not to deny themselves of it. It is that important.
And as American writer, Laura Wilder, once said, it is the sweet, simple things of life which are the real ones after all.
Lack of, or inadequate copulation among couples could cause trouble and plunge peaceful homes into crisis, especially when it is inadequate or one party is not satisfied. And in most cases, it is the woman that is usually left unsatisfied.
This trend has been traced to the fact that as long as the glans (the sensitive rounded ‘cap’ on the penis with about 4,000 nerve endings) is stimulated for some time, whether through thrusting or manual stimulation, the man is on a fast lane to ejaculation.
But for women, penile intercourse does not guarantee orgasm because the clitoris, which is the most sensitive part of a woman’s erogenous zones, comprising about 8,000 sensory nerve endings, is not located in the vagina; rather, it is located on the vulva, towards the north side of the vaginal opening.
Studies have shown that only about 25 per cent of women reach orgasm consistently, while out of the remaining 75 per cent, 50 per cent reach that destination sometimes, while 20 per cent hardly ever reach it and the remaining five per cent never reach the destination.
Experts say it is not uncommon for some women to fake orgasm as a way of boosting their husbands’ ego. But a study has revealed that women who fake orgasm are more likely to cheat on their husbands.
The researchers from the University of Missouri in the United States said their study showed that the more a woman fakes reaching orgasm the higher the likelihood of cheating. They also found that some women who fake it but do not have the will to cheat on their husbands could lose interest in sex.
In the course of the study, the researchers gathered 121 males and 138 females, all of whom were in romantic relationships. They were asked questions based on their sexual satisfaction and the likelihood for them to cheat. At the end of the study, it was gathered that people who faked orgasm during sex with their partners were more likely to be unfaithful. It was also revealed that men who knew or felt their partners were faking sexual satisfaction were not happy in the relationship because it affected their ego.
“Faked orgasm was associated with female sexual infidelity and lower male relationship satisfaction,” the researchers said.
To avoid cheating on a partner (women) or moving about with a punctured ego (men), the researchers advised such persons to talk about it with their partner, which could help them devise an approach to solve it.
Commenting on the findings of the study, a professor of psychology, Oni Fagboungbe, said if a woman remained unsatisfied sexually, she could be tempted to seek the satisfaction outside or engage in acts that could reduce the urge.
He said, “Our lives as humans revolve around needs satisfaction, and you cannot fake satisfaction. If for social reasons, like trying to please your partner, you fake orgasm, it is when you reach that level that you become satisfied. So, I will agree with the findings.
“If a lady fakes it, it means in reality, that such a lady is not satisfied, and therefore, when the need, which is a state of deprivation experienced by an individual, is still there, it brings about tension and anxiety. This would lead to a drive or urge to getting satisfied. Therefore, in order to attain that balance, they are likely to go and seek it elsewhere.
“For those who do not have the will or mind to cheat, it can resort to masturbation because need is very strong, and until that need is satisfied, it remains a need that would continue to bombard the person’s thoughts.”